What? Proudly Imperfect?
Yes! Back in March, I ran a coached workshop for working mums, which focused on addressing the specific challenges of those mums who work outside of the home. Following the feedback from this, and from all those of you who completed my survey about what you’d like, I decided that the best way to reach even more of you would be to create an online programme for all parents, on the more general theme of letting go of the idea of parenting perfectly.
Why am I doing this?
Because none of us are perfect parents. Right now, there is a lot out there about being ‘perfectly imperfect’ and why it’s important… And we nod and smile and say ‘Yes!’ but deep down, do we really believe it’s ok to be imperfect, flawed even..?
When my son was first born, I fell into this ‘story’ for a minute. I read some books on the first year and re-read some stuff on early development while pregnant and had some idea about routines but I was mostly taking on board what I liked and doing what felt right for us. On our own, we were fine. When other people questioned me though, I started to question myself. Was I wrong? Not good enough?
Over time I became more confident and now, although I have my off days, I know why I do what I do and I’m not afraid to make mistakes and change something if it’s not working. Why? Well first and foremost, my internal representation of a good mother isn’t a perfect one. My mother wasn’t perfect but she was perfect for me…. And as a coach, I know that what I used to perceive as failure is actually just feedback. If I try new approach to parenting and it doesn’t work, then I try something else…
Perhaps you have an idea in your head about what the perfect parent is and despite all the nodding when you read about being perfectly imperfect, inside, you actually still want to live up to this ideal (which will be different for each of us) and get upset when you don’t.
How can we really let go of this idea of what we feel we need to be and truly be who we are, knowing that this will benefit both us and our children?
I’m not a parenting expert. I’m not a perfect parent. And that’s kind of the point. If you’d like a step-by-step guide on how to parent better, you won’t find it here. What you will find is a mum who tries to be a gentle parent and sometimes fails. A mum whose own mum was less than perfect but more than she could have wished for in an early role model for love. A coach who knows how to ask the right questions to shift your story from ‘I’m not enough’ to ‘I am good enough. And that’s more than good enough’ so that you can honestly state, ‘I am a proudly imperfect parent’.
By the end of the four-week course, you’ll be paying more attention to what you’re already doing that works for you and your family (so you can do even more of that and less of what doesn’t serve you, or them) and you’ll have a deeper, more personal understanding of how being even more of yourself can take you from anxious about what you’re doing ‘wrong’ to proud of how your imperfect parenting actually works. For your whole family.
Who says there’s a right way to parent anyway? Right…?
The four-week course will launch in early 2016. To be first to find out more and know when dates are confirmed, make sure you sign up to the Proudly Imperfect Parents mailing list, where you’ll also be first to receive any freebies or special offers!